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Ride to Hell

The cover for Ride to Hell. Caution the game's not as cool as it may be presented in this cover.

“Previousl... ugh.. Previously on Ride to Heel? Retribution” — The opening scene to every Ride to Hell gameplay.


Ride To Hell: Retribution is one of the most awful games the Inside Gaming members had to endure in the history of mankind. The game deals with the story of Jake Conway, an angry and merciless biker, who wants to avenge the death of his brother Mikey, a "tall sack of shit" as Jake would say.

Origins[]

Adam, Bruce and James first played Ride to Hell in a small series of a collection of the worst games of 2013. Eventually, the game was turned into a series by popular demand.

You can see the origin episode here.

Story[]

Ride to Hell: Retribution is telling the story of Jake Conway who wants to live a peaceful life with his uncle Mack and brother Mikey after coming home from Vietnam where he constantly masturbated. After Mikey gets killed by some kind of villain called Colt and his gang, Jake swears vengeance and starts his devastating rampage across the country to hunt down the people who killed his brother.

Another big part of the story is Jake's eternal quest for sex. He tries to have sexual intercourse with as many women as possible. The only difference to sex in Ride to Hell and in real life is that nobody in the game ever takes off their clothes while doing it. Jake is a chronic masturbator and many of the sexual encounters are hallucinations.

Character List[]

  • Jake Conway: The loyal and angry biker protagonist of Ride to Hell. He supposedly served in Vietnam but it is more likely he was masturbating somewhere the whole time.
  • Mikey Conway: Jake's little brother and prospective biker, who dies at the beginning. He's a tall sack of shit who likes bands.
  • Mack: Jake's uncle who helps him avenge the death of his brother, but he is no use at all.
  • Anvil: A member of Colt's gang. He is a fat bald member of the gang who spends his free time slicing the ears off baby cows.
  • Colt: One of the dudes Jake kills. He has a habit of telling people to leave right before telling them to come back.
  • Meathook: An Irish member of Colt's gang who got his nickname after his penis.
  • Caesar: The main antagonist of Ride to Hell.
  • The Prostitutes: The many women that Jake has sex with (having having all of their clothes on).
  • Ellie: Mikey's "girlfriend", but she is probably just being stalked by Mikey.

Episode List[]

Gallery[]

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They call him Colt for a reason.

Trivia[]

  • Ride to Hell is by far the worst game IG has ever played. Chaser feels like Red Dead Redemption compared to Ride to Hell.
  • Seriously, Ride to Hell is even worse than that Kim Kardashian game.
  • Just listen to me, if Ride to Hell would be a human, Hitler would be like an angel next to him.
  • Ride to Hell: Retribution is Semi-Perfect Cell's favorite game.
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